The Perils Of Dictation, And Vis Monday Reminder


Since I broke my right wrist, I haven’t been able to type. Thank goodness for voice recognition software, that speedily and effortlessly translates my spoken words to print. Okay, we may have to take out the “effortlessly” because there is a lot of editing involved, to spare the children!

Voice recognition isn’t state-of-the-art yet, at least not on my Mac. It often transcribes the full word “exclamation”, for example, when I just wanted to type a damn exclamation point! It jumbles words together, capitalizes any old noun it desires, and really is only a little bit better than typing with a pencil in my teeth.

A fine example.

A fine example of voice-to-text.

I thought you might enjoy a few of the more colorful missed transcriptions that almost snuck past me in the last three weeks. The most common error was “Expo” for my usual sign-off “xo”. We also had:

boho = blowhole

linking = licking (ugh, imagine thanking a refined fellow blogger for “licking” up to my post.)

orchestra = orca

wrap = rat  (I told Pao I admired her “rat shirt”.)

thanks = angst

And my personal favorite, when I was writing about the “pins” sticking out of my broken arm, the words were typed as “penis sticking out of my arm”. That would’ve made for a truly memorable Visible Monday.


Stay fabulous, and see you at the new “Easy does it” Visible Monday,


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  1. Blowhole-licking rat style – I think you’ve just identified the next new angsty trend!
    Hahahaha!!! – PA it is. I think there is a little imp that lives in our computers whose just is just to feck with us. Yours just knew you needed a laugh at that particular moment.

  2. Hahahahahaha! That would have been VERY freaky!!! We could have Called you “penis arm!” Or PA for short ; P

    Every time I’ve tried to use voice recognition on my phone it is just a joke. It must not like my Canadian accent at all.

    Have a great long weekend!


    • Do you have an accent, Suzanne? You sound just like me when we talk. Feel free to call me PA, at least for two more weeks, 🙂 xox

  3. Very funny. Thanks for sharing even though you have a penis sticking out of
    your arm.

  4. This is hilarious.
    On the other hand, there are people who make some of these mistakes without the benefit of dictation software. They simply can’t spell. It makes one wonder about the future.

  5. I wondered how you soldiered on, typing with a broken wrist! I hope it is healing well. This post is so funny, and I can truly relate! I use Siri for notes and lists on my phone, and sometimes the results are hilarious. Fortunately, no-one sees them but me, but sometimes I go back later and it’s a puzzle to figure out what “I” said!

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