Bad habits I’m giving up in 2021. Resolutions – I don’t really make them. I prefer evolution to resolutions. Not only because resolutions have a truly horrendous track record. I prefer to think a lot and change one thing at a time, and see how the river flows. Like letting my hair go silver – it’s not a resolution but a day by day process.
That said, I am resolving (and evolving) to give up these unhelpful behaviors:
1. Comparing. It is the thief of joy. There is always, and has always been, someone smarter, prettier and more beguiling than I. I will focus more on what I do well, and not worry about the other things. We can’t all be ballerinas or captains of industry.
2. Taking loved ones for granted. I’m learning to really appreciate the handful of people who are dear to me, as life is full of unexpected turns (hello, pandemic). Saying “I love you” and meaning it, and behaving it, is a priority.
3. Being motivated by guilt. My former therapist told me, “Either dump the guilt, or do things that make you feel good about yourself.” Feeling guilty for no good reason is the worst of my bad habits.
4. Owning other people’s problems. I am not the big fixer, though I have wanted to be. I want to support and listen but I don’t have to take on the weight of the world. All those people survived for hundreds of thousands of years without me.
5. Believing all my time has to be accounted for. Even if I weren’t retired, I still could have unstructured time. It’s OK to relax, read a novel on a park bench, listen to Ray Charles, or browse the New York Times Style and Real Estate sections. We all can slow down a little, we women who Get It All Done.
Not that you have any bad habits! But is there anything you’d like to do differently in 2021? Share in the comments, please. 😊
Stay fabulous and safe, wash and wash and wash (your hands), xo
Also resolved: wear the things I love the most. Here are some goodies to browse: