The Confidence Of Age

The confidence of age. Growing older is a trade-off, as are most things in life. In youth, we have socially-defined beauty and high energy. It’s part of the evolutionary plan, and it works to help us attract mates and reproduce ourselves.

In mid-life and later we look different from our young selves, not as stereotypically beautiful. We’re no longer the target for the newest fashion or makeup. The markets are slowly expanding, though, as advertisers understand the consumer power of the mid-life woman. We’re now seeing ad campaigns with spokespeople like Charlotte Rampling and Marc Jacobs – check out this photo, and swoon.

And this wonderful Pinterest page devoted to older women still representing: we’re not dead yet.

I love this ad for skin care featuring an older woman who most definitely has her own face. Photo by Curology on Unsplash

All for the good. We can’t deny we’re changing physically; it’s part of life. Even the priciest plastic surgery won’t take away the morning stiffness, or need for reading glasses, or sore feet. We’re also changing in positive ways, ways that are becoming more real to me now that age 65 has swiftly come and gone.

“My face carries all my memories. Why would I erase them?”

-Diane Von Furstenberg

Here are some of the trade-offs for me and my 50+ year-old friends:

  • We are much more relaxed. “What’s the worst that could happen?” has probably already been lived through, or won’t be repeated. Heinous hurricane season of 2004 – I’m talking about you.
  • We’ve given away some of our perfectionism. I really truly cannot leave the house without making the bed, still, but I can make it loosely ☺.  I can skip eye make-up and feel fine with lipgloss and blush. I don’t balance my checkbook to the penny; I round up.
  • We know stuff. My teenage nieces are discovering the mystery of boys. Boys, I know all about them. Men too.
  • We major in the majors. For the minors – broken dishes, leaky faucets, the rogue pimple, a bad meal at a restaurant — we use our humor to cope and keep on going.
  • We know our limits (I won’t be a ballerina or surgeon) but keep pushing for more too (I’m taking singing lessons and improving!).
  • We aren’t easily intimidated, by bankers, doctors, bosses, decorators, or boyfriends. Even a letter from the IRS doesn’t scare me anymore; I’ve gotten those before and lived through.

Cheers to us, a confident, street-smart, style savvy, and unruffled group. Cheers to you! xxxx



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  1. Yeah, there are upsides to this whole aging thang. Some days they are more apparent than others but on the whole I’m appreciating the strength that comes with the process. Thanks for this uplifting post!

    • Hello Shelley and I hope you’re feeling well! Thanks for coming over and for your wise words. Let’s hear it for grown-up coping skills. Stay fab, xx.

  2. Hi Patti,
    Your post gave me a good chuckle. You made so any great points, I found myself nodding agreement as I read. Many of us older gals (I’m 73) truly do mellow out and lighten up as we age. There are still a few things that’ll freak me out, but I think most stuff rolls off my back. (Hmm . . . mellow out, lighten up, go with the flow. Maybe we were all onto something back in the 60s after all)! Thanks for the grin.

    • Hi Judy and thanks for coming by! Yes, we are returning to our hippie selves, realizing we had some good ideas back in the day! Have a wonderful weekend, stay well, xx.

  3. Thank you for another of your positive uplifting post. Reminds me of a Betty Friedan quote.
    “Aging is not lost youth but a new stage of opportunity and strength.” Betty Friedan

    • Hello Joan and thank you for coming over, and your kind words. i love that Betty Friedan quote. Stay well, xx.

  4. It’s really good to take a look at “the tradeoffs.” Sometimes I forget to appreciate how far I’ve come. You’re so right about not being easily intimidated and knowing things.

    • Hi Kim and thanks as always for coming by. It is a good thing to be not-intimidated! We’re strong and smart. Have a great day, xx.

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