Some Days Aging Is A Punch In The Nose

All of us over-50 bloggers are on the positive aging wagon – I am too. Many things in life are better, easier, and more fun with a little wisdom and experience, and usually a few more dollars. We’re not dead yet.

So if you want to keep those positive aging vibes going, stop reading now! JK, but I am in a not-so-positive aging funk. Here’s why:

Yesterday I went through my memory box, in preparation for moving to a new apartment (two blocks away – but on the second floor). I sorted through hundreds of photos from all the chapters and people in my life. Being young isn’t easy but all the possibilities are ahead of you then.

Little Sweetie

Ahh youth! And 1980’s earrings!

Career, marriage/s, travel, moving around the country or the world, taking risks and looking gorgeous without knowing it. Effortless skin and healthy hair, on five hours of sleep a night.  The thrill of waiting for the phone to ring, or dialing it ourselves to hear a young man say “hullo?”I remember a short and simple “beauty routine.” I now exercise every day and allow an afternoon a week for maintenance.

Us

Sandy and me about 17 years ago.

I admit I had a little cry, for what was and will not be again. There’s no mistaking the passage of time, when you look at a picture of your 28 year-old self and then in the mirror. I remind myself that in ten years I will look at current pictures and say, “Whoa, I was such a babe at 61.”

And the people I’ve loved who’ve left – so many of them appear in the old pictures. Grandma Lucy and my Dad – seen here dancing at my parents’ wedding. Brother-in-law Randy, father-in-law Butch. It’s enough to make you long to travel back in time and show more love.

Wedding copy

Grandma Lucy and my father at my parents’ wedding. Love her fascinator!

Us and Randy

I miss Randy – Sandy’s oldest brother, on the left. He was a life force!

This sounds like a melancholy post from an upbeat blogger, and it is. Sometimes we need to get sad to get more authentic, closer to the bone of who we are and what life holds. I am less sad now, just having shared these thoughts with you. And I am determined to suck the juice out of every day, enjoy the sandwiches, keep up my yoga stretches, and hunt for the Perfect Red Lipstick. Aging is not for sissies, so power on, my lovelies.

Stay fabulous,

And to keep the cheer alive, here are some lovely picks from the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale:


Please be aware that links to vendors may be affiliate links. I do benefit from your purchases through the links on the blog.

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19 Comments

  1. Dear Patti, I haven’t commented before. This post is very touching and wise. You look so like your father, which I am sure you have heard many times. My very best wishes to you, and thank you for your words.

  2. I’ve just started catching up on a few blogs, and I had to look at this one. I also went through ALL my old photos before our move. It was great to embrace my history, and the awkward photos made me appreciate the little bit of grace I’ve gained with age.

    It’s fun to see your old photos – you really haven’t changed! Good luck with the move.

  3. It can be difficult some days to look in the mirror and wonder who that person is who is staring back at you, and how did they get so old? My hair is turning grey at a much faster speed than I ever imagined, and now that I’m not colouring my hair I am acutely aware of it. I like the colour, but it’s still a bit of a shock, and a reality check moment. I was never that comfortable with how I looked in my 20’s and 30’s and think I am much more so now, so in that sense, getting older has been a positive thing for me.
    You and Sandy are still such a handsome couple – Suzanne is right, you really haven’t changed much at all. I can easily become melancholy looking at old photos, papers, letters, etc. and realizing that more of my life is now behind me than is in front of me.

  4. Thank you for sharing, Patti. I try not to look back (but I do believe Bran Adams got it wrong – it should be 35 til I die! My 30’s…I would love to have the physical body from then but cut the shoulder pads and big hair…but my wisdom – not so great, still a long way to go). But despite the awful times, there are millions of gems and I choose to remember them with fondness. And love every moment of being alive now. Blessings to you. xx

  5. Sometimes getting older is a bitter pill to swallow but the alternative is worse. You still look great Patti…I guess we all have days when we don’t feel so good but they pass. Keep smiling 🙂

  6. Patti, at 66, I know where you are coming from. So much more time is taken with just maintenance (fighting genetics on certain things) that can get so time consuming. At one time exercise was just an optional activity to take some weight off, now it is a constant companion to hopefully stave off a few health issues. I have more direct facts to keep me reminded. Every time our oldest daughter Michelle turns a year older (she’s 41 now), I always think back what it was like when I was her age, and its always, “how did the time go so quickly” and our baby just turned 35 so things like that always remind that time goes it quick pace and I had better enjoy it.

  7. That was a lovely and bittersweet post. Thanks for your candor in sharing it!

  8. Sorting out all the stuff definitely triggers the memories and reminds us of the swift passage of time. I’ve been trying to sort out the parental home for five years and still get defeated when i uncover an old photograph or an odd earring.
    Honestly you looked no different 17 years ago. xxx

  9. Yes, looking back is bittersweet. But that is life. I love how I looked when I was young and am pained to look in the mirror today but, as you smartly say, I’ll feel the same way in ten years about today. We need to appreciate our lives as we are living them. That’s the real lesson.

  10. My older son is turning 25 today, and I’ve been looking at old photos and thinking how quickly time passes (and how I sometimes think I’m 25!).

    Old photos can bring a lot of joy but certainly also feelings of loss and sadness. Thanks for sharing yours!

  11. This post really resonated with me. For me as well looking back (and forward) is almost always tinged with the shadow of loss. Memories of people no longer with us; facing a future without special people in our lives yet still happy to be alive and curious to explore and experience. I have come to accept this as part of the human condition for those of us lucky enough to get this far. To be happy and upbeat at all times at this age (or any for that matter) is not real and true. Thank you for sharing.

  12. Honestly, I don’t think you look that much different from 17 years ago! I’ve found that a good hairdressing creme will tame wild hair back into its more youthful look, and a lighter color lipstick with my blond coloring wasn’t so harsh on my aging lack of dewy skin. I think you’re doing great!

  13. I totally get this, Patti! Looking back can be so bittersweet. As you say, the people who are gone, the dreams that were never realized, the realization that time is slipping by. But, there are still more dreams to dream and memories to be made!

  14. What’s the saying youth is wasted on the young? My daughters are gorgeous, but I hear them down grade some of what I think are beautiful. “I have no but!” well, when there is little to sag twenty years later, they won’t be so unhappy! I;m only 50 and feel like I;ve lost so many people since my twenties-my parents, my sister, two brother-in-laws and a sister in law, friends. Good memories, but with a dose of sadness. I’m on a no clothes buying spree right now, but like to look at the latest styles anyway.

  15. Aw Patti, lots of virtual hugs from the left coast (((((((((o))))))))))))
    I’ve been delving deep into memories for my latest linkup series and have actually been having a good time with it. I guess I’m concentrating more on the positive powerful moments vs the people that are no longer here.
    I’m lucky — being an artist, every day is still a possible creative adventure. Today, for instance, I made some elements for prints using a golf ball as a stamping tool. Ten minutes: a golf ball, black ink, and a pile of blank paper. WooHoo!

  16. Looking at old photos will do that to me every time as well.

    I really feel the loss of open ended endless possibilities and carefree adventure. It feels like so many of the important chapters in my book may have already been written and now I’m sliding down the hill to the grave.

    For what it’s worth I had a very hard time noticing the difference between you now and you 17 years ago. I’m not kidding and not trying to suck up Ha ha! The only real difference I noticed was the colour of your hair. Otherwise, you seem to be stuck in a time warp and don’t even realise it.

    I’m sure the move is bringing up all kinds of emotions. Moving always does.

    bisous
    Suzanne

  17. It is so nostalgic looking back at our pictures!! But great fun too with such wonderful memories.
    I think you’re exactly right about looking back and thinking we looked great (yet at the time we didn’t think so). That’s why I keep trying to like myself now and enjoy the present!!
    Love these pictures—thanks for sharing!
    jodie
    http://www.jtouchofstyle.com

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