My Biggest Mirror Challenge Is . . .

How would you finish this sentence: “When I look in the mirror, my biggest challenge is . . . ” Note I didn’t use self-negating words like “What I hate” or “what I have to change”.

The “challenge” can be something psychological, like “accepting the fact that my face isn’t so taut anymore” (OK that’s one of mine). Or “recognizing that I have hips like almost all women, and not like the 3% who are naturally built like supermodels.”

Or the challenge may be (and this is confessional too), that “I get a bit lazy” about going the extra step to improve my look. Black tee, check. Dark jeans, check. Everything clean and fresh? Yes – ready to go. My “challenge” is to take a few extra moments to reflect about a scarf, bracelet, killer shoe or lipstick that will raise my physical confidence.

I almost never get my outfits ready the night before. I envy women who do. They are probably much better put together the next morning (duh) and have fewer mirror-challenges. So I am working on this. Many of you bloggers are helping me.

So fresh, so cool, so organized! OK, it’s Barbie, but still, I envy.

I am working on the other issues too — about the not-quite-so-young (but Not Dead Yet) face that looks back at me. This is head-and-heart work. Recently I have been saying aloud things like “You’ve got your own face now, and you earned it, congratulations!” and “That smile has something interesting to say.”

My goal is to have many endings for this sentence:  “When I look in the mirror, what I love is . . .”

Please share any ways you might complete the sentences. I’d love to hear your thoughts.

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  1. Well, I have to prepare my outfit the night before, since I'm such a lazy late sleeper! Haha!

    Visit me:LeeAnne, Style N Season

  2.  My biggest challenge would be my hair and my biggest love would be my body. But basically I'm past this stage and take myself as it is. But I recognise the need to  go this extra mile to look the best I can.

  3. "Black tee, check. Dark jeans, check." — that's my uniform! Just add your G ring and some lipstick and cute shoes and you'll be as dressed up as I am most days!

  4. My biggest challenge is my skin. Years of products, drugs, HBC pills, going through puberty. I still break out every day with new bumps. They're not as visible on me as some people, but they hurt. 

    But I love my hair, my eyes, my figure, my height. I'm generally happy to be who I am. My biggest support is my daily photos of myself. To some it may seem vain to have a fashion blog, to take photos of yourself every day, but for me? It puts myself in perspective. It makes me see I don't look like fashion models, but I DO look good. I look like myself, and not somebody else, that's okay.

  5. Hi Patti!

    Believe it or not when i look in the mirror i like what i see more than when i was 20, 30 or 40…I never taught i was pretty, never, i always found something wrong with my face, but now i quite like it even tough gravity is taking over…:)

  6. When I look in the mirror, I see my smile. I am a happy woman and I know the smile is cherished by some wonderful people. My grandchildren all light up when they see my smile because I bring them joy- almost as much as they bring me. This is one of the best times of my life and, as a woman, my goal is not to become "invisible" as so many women of a certain age do. I still love fashion (not fads) and love that I have figured out my own  style. It's all good.

  7. Sometimes it depends on the mirror and sometimes it depends on my state of mind.  When I'm feeling good, I like and accept what I see.  When I'm feeling insecure and fragile, it is reflected back to me and I can be self critical and negative.  So the key for me is to feel good, to feel healthy, to feel alive.  

    Great post Patti! 

  8. I have several full-length mirrors in my home that I use when I get dressed and one of my biggest gripes is that neither of them is in a place where the light is very good.  I'm stuck with what I am but I sure like to see it before I walk out the door so I can do what's possible.

  9. Oh, great question! I think my answer would be much the same as yours – my biggest challenge these days is to accept that the face looking back at me isn't 20 any more: what I actually look like is never the same as how I look in my own mind!

  10. What an interesting post And gosh – I've never spent a great deal of time looking in the mirror, my make-up takes about three-minutes to apply & that's only because I'm rubbish with mascara! But I suppose these days my biggest mirror challenge is my less-than-firm flesh and the wrinkles.

  11. When I look in the mirror,  what I love is…..

    How happy, vibrant and alive I look!! Yeah–this fabulousness is packaged in a short, apple-shaped menopausel gal with cow-licky hair and blotchy skin…..

    I am a Supermodel in my own life and I don't care what anyone else thinks!!

  12. When I look in the mirror, what I love is how the clothes I'm wearing plus my smile can send a silent but powerful message about who I am to everyone that is looking.

    When I look in the mirror, my biggest challenge is accepting my own judgement – just because others think a mass-marketed style looks good on me doesn't mean I have to buy it.

  13.  Pls, Terri – get thee to a medical professional asap! I've had some thingies removed and was really happy that I did.

  14.  "my head is a very busy place" — love that! xoxoxo

  15. This is really thought provoking, what a great blog post.  Mine would be "I do wish I wasn't quite so pale", coupled with "lucky I managed to *almost* keep my figure after having a kid" 🙂

  16. When I look in the mirror what I LOOOVE is my bedhead hair first thing in the morning. It cracks me up, makes me laugh – the best way to start my day. Seriously, my hair is anti-gravitational, truly a work of art, I look like Mr. Bean after pulling his head out of a turkey, in case you know that episode… My hair is not exactly my face, but I can't focus on my fair because of my hair! 

  17. This post reminds me of several that I posted. 
    Coming to terms with aging and a body that is larger than I'd like has made for many painful "sightings"and the message that I send to myself is not usually a positive one.

    Your positivity is healthy and one that inspires gratitude.

    When I look in the mirror I love "that there is a wise woman looking back at me."

  18. When I look in the mirror, my biggest challenge…is, oh, crikey, I've never published this, but truly, is my big nose." Ugh.

    When I look in the mirror, what I love is my full lips. My little sister used to call me "Lard Lips" when we were kids. Heh. At almost 50, lard lips rock…lol.

    Patti, you always amaze me with your sensitivity and insight, but honestly, you are one of of the loveliest women I've ever seen. 

  19. Since the family wedding last fall, I have had a persistent blemish on my left check that has been very slow to heal.  My way of dealing with it has been to avoid the mirror…but I can't stop touching the dang thing.  Not good, I know.

  20. My biggest challenge when looking in the mirror is…
    – not zeroing in on my "flaws" and trying to see the whole me.
    – seeing myself as I am, not as who I used to be, or who I want to be.

    Great post, Patti!

  21. I was just saying to myself this morning how much I love the brown spots on my hands and arms. My skin is like a map of my history!

  22. I'm with Bella — photos are harder than the mirror for me. (Though the mirror is catching up LOL!). When I look in the mirror, I'd like to say something that will help me throughout me day, with the other kinds of insecurities that arise. (They don't end at appearance, unfortunately!)  Maybe something like, "strength." Or "integrity." Or I could try Serene's: "Own it!"

  23. My challenge is less with the mirror and more with the picture frame. For some reason my mirror image seems pleasant enough- likable smile, but when I see pictures of me (esp when someone else takes them) I think: that's what I look like? I always appear fatter, squattier, goofier than how I do in my minds' eye. No matter, I work on self acceptance. Especially as I age and lose any semblance to a fashion model.

    When I look in the mirror what I love is … is the fact that I can look in the mirror. My biggest challenge is to remember to that happiness exists in the moment and not in some foggy future where I think it can be bought with a new pair of shoes/object. 

  24. Great post, Patti. What I love when I look in the mirror? Depends on the day. I am in a "good" place with myself these days so I don't pick on my flaws too much. But there was a time when I was unhappy with pretty much everything. How we feel about ourselves has so many layers – it's rather complicated. 

  25. Patti, I sooooo get it!  I find myself looking in the mirror every now and then and thinking, "What the HECK happened to you?!?" and honestly at other times, I'll think, "Dang girly!  You look GOOD!"  My head is a VERY busy place!  Why is it SO difficult for us to celebrate the unique things about ourselves that make us unique?  Great post!!  Hugs!  Serene

  26. I OWNED that exact Barbie outfit, only I remember the dress was blue!  When I look in the mirror, I tell myself, "You have EARNED the face and body of a beloved grandmother — and enjoy it while you can."

  27. When I look in the mirror what I love is I can cover the skin cancer surgery scars on my forehead, left cheek, both sides of my nose ~~ with good makeup!  I'm thankful to be here as well ………..

  28. great post!
    i think i am coming to terms with the not so young looking face by looking at those older hollywood women who haven't had a lot of face work done
    i look at them and see life, character and stories
    the ones withe the work done…just look plastic and frankly, not that attractive!!

    as for what i don't like seeing in the mirror…where did those hips come from?????

  29. When I look in the mirror my biggest challenge is facing the fact that I am built like a big spindle overloaded with thread in the middle, or maybe a pear on popcicle sticks.  I am shopping for a nice maxi skirt that will at least minimize the lower thin  part of the spindle.

  30.  Oops, I think I was suppose to say "This is what I love." So, what I love is that I'm alive and healthy and have clothing to cover my narrow shoulders and small chest. LOL

  31. Hi Patti! First of all that Barbara ensemble image cracks me up! You almost had me for a minute.
    My  challenge when I look in the mirror has always been my very narrow shoulders and small chest so I feel way out of proportion if I don't wear something structured on top AND a padded bra. And let's face it, structure and extra padding isn't always comfy or casual. And its too hot in the summer. So my realization after typing this is that I just need to change my attitude!
    I love this thought provoking post!

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