I found this quote somewhere in my serendipitous internet wanderings (maybe Facebook? Sorry for lack of attribution). I began a meditation on comparison. Comparing myself to others, and finding myself less-than, was a common theme of my early life. I worked through it, though.
- I got over wanting to be the models in Seventeen magazine, even in Glamour and Elle, by learning to appreciate my own brand of beauty.
- I got over wanting to be taller, blonder, have perfect teeth and skin, by recognizing that those things are not part of my reality, and are not equivalent to happiness.
- I got over wanting to be a “better” employee than so-and-so by recognizing that I am uniquely skilled to do what I do. I’m far from perfect, but I care and I work hard at my craft.
I still live with a compare demon. I’m not yet “over” being not-young any more, and sometimes I compare my place in the cosmos with those 20 years behind me. Rats and rats! I’m supposed to be past this now. (But judging the judging is not helpful.)
Must. stop. comparing. And keep focusing on the reality of mid-life, my real life, and it’s a damn good one. Must keep my head out of my navel, look around and see what needs to be done, and do what I can do about it. A 57 year-old woman can bring a lot to the party when she’s not wasting time comparing.
So here’s to owning the present, savoring the wisdom and perspective of age, appreciating the zest and beauty of youth without longing. Not Dead Yet, after all!
Has comparison ever been an issue for you? Have you worked though it? I love to read your remarks.