What Are You Moving Toward, Style Edition?


Today I’m updating a post I wrote over six years ago, about moving-toward and moving-away. It’s an exercise I used to assign to my counseling patients: make two lists, one of the things you are moving away from, and the other of things you are moving toward. It helps us see where we’re making progress in our lives, how far we have come already, and where we want our goals to take us.

I thought it would be fun to apply this exercise to wardrobe and style. I’d love to hear your own responses in the comments, and here are my answers from 2011, along with an update from 2018:

I am moving away from:

  • Being “too cheap” with myself (still true.)
  • Buying disposable, fast-clothing pieces that support unfair labor practices (much progress made here.)
moving toward and away

From the exhibition Fast Fashion: The Dark Side Of Fashion, by the Museum of Arts and Crafts Hamburg.

  • Feeling bad about my aging face and neck (doing better at this; the passage of time requires it.)
  • Envy of others’ wardrobes/talents/blogs (still a temptation, but much less so.)
  • Falling back on black and gray for my comfort zone (I changed my mind, and allow myself to love black and gray.)
moving toward and away

I still love wearing black.

  • Predictability (Bingo, I won this one! I’m far more spontaneous and daring with my style.)

I am moving toward:

  • Being more discerning when I thrift-shop. Just because it’s $4, doesn’t mean I have to have it. (Lots of progress here; I’m getting more particular.)
  • Budgeting for a few higher-quality pieces to elevate my wardrobe (I have some work to do, on “deserving” really nice things.)
moving toward and away

I want to own and wear this Pucci dress.

  • Accepting the changes in my face and body, while staying healthy and fit. (After a traumatic broken wrist last year, I am more grateful to have good health, and less worried about a few wrinkles.)
  • Appreciation of my own closet and my own gifts. (I’m enjoying playing with fewer pieces, and still making good-looking outfits.)
  • Creativity. (It’s something I’m always craving, and looking around corners for. Maybe if I relax a little it will come?)
moving toward and away

From Tiny Buddha, a good site to browse.

I am sure there are more, and I’ll probably add to this list as the year goes on. What are you moving away from/toward? Or are you at a sweet spot right now?

Enjoy every day, appreciate yourself, and stay fabulous, xox,


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  1. I really like the idea of these two lists, and think I may have to do them for myself. There would be some similar items to yours, such as moving away from buying items in thrift stores just because they are $5 (they usually end up getting donated back), and trying to move towards acceptance of my aging face and body (not there yet, work in progress. I have realized I will always love wearing black and gray and it’s OK!

  2. This is a very interesting and inspiring post. We all need to be mindful about our choices. I am like you in that I do not like to buy fast fashion. And I am learning not to buy something that is an expensive just for the sake of the price. Also like you, I am able to budget for the occasional splurge. We are worth it. I am also moving towards a healthier body with a very strict, healthy diet and yoga . I’ve always been conscientious about my health, but with my autoimmune disease I have to be very vigilant. Thank you for sharing this thoughtful and personal post. PS, buy that PUCCI !

  3. Since I let my hair turn white, I’m moving away from the muted colors and over-size contours I’ve loved toward crisper effects in style and color and a closer fit. For example, stand-up collars and contrasts in layered colors, which are less muted than before. The white hair is complemented by these changes, and I think they give a more energetic impression.

    • That’s truly forward-looking, Carol. i’ve found my silver hair changes my color and fit preferences too. xo

  4. Six months into retirement is a good time to try this exercise. Thanks!

  5. As we age, and we all prefer doing that, I think we do need to continue to evaluate and re-process where we are currently and what we need to do to not stay there. This is hard, but I admire you for taking the steps necessary for you. I could also apply some of those to myself and plan to. Thank you.

  6. This is a really interesting exercise.
    Next time you come for a visit I’ll take photos of you wearing that Pucci dress : P

    I’m moving away from social media pressure. I’ve essentially dumped FB and Twitter and am happy about that.

    I’m moving towards spending less time thinking and more time doing.


    • I love these paths you’re choosing, S! And yes, if the dress is still available I’d be tickled to model it for a moment : >

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